Watch "Don't Look Up" on Netflix
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2021/dec/26/id-like-to-know-who-my-parents-are
@corsent (twitter handle)
"we need to bring into the mainstream the idea that adoption, as an industry, functions to transfer social wealth from the materially poorer to the materially richer."
She escaped an abusive “home” which today we might describe as creating Adverse Childhood Experiences.
Her abuser(s) engaged in
1. Physical Abuse
2. Suspected Sexual abuse
3. Verbal
4. Emotional
5. Isolation
6. Torture
7. Retaliation
8. Jealousy
9. Intentional Cruelty
She craved love, stability, kindness, connection, safety, encouragement, opportunities to fulfill her dreams wrt education, archeology, music.
Her early experiences of "love", "family", "mothering" did not prepare her for success in marriage or other long term relationships.
She tried to parent but was not able to.
She didn't have the benefit of being able to "go home" as a safety net.
She surrendered custody of her children.
The concept of being "deserving"
Who "deserves" to be a parent?
The ways we stone women who fail to be perfect mothers. The ways we condemn as an individual personal failing to not have a baby/family rather than examine the material conditions which make "having a family" look impossible, unattainable. That June Cleaver was propaganda. The white suburbs were DESIGNED to be white-only spaces, with good schools. That women resented
https://www.propublica.org/article/a-mother-needed-welfare-instead-the-state-used-welfare-funds-to-take-her-son?utm_source=twitter&utm_medium=social
The worship of the WWII white dude GIs who came home, impregnated girls and skipped town, who fathered second families without a care, whose second family refused to have any curiosity about their half-siblings. Not even to notify them about the death of their father.
Maybe I should go out of my way to contact the half-siblings of my ex-husbands, to tell them the last known contact info I had for my-ex-in-laws. Isn't that also a level of complicity? I know that there is an abandoned kin relation but I also do not know how to reach that offspring.
my dad's blood family--we do not have "family traditions" in common, like holiday recipes or traditions. We don't exchange cards, except for perhaps this year I may receive a card from my cousin. No other second cousin or farther keeps in touch. We barely do. Thinking of my cousin with whom I spent early christmases who just lost his parents, and I don't even have his phone or email address to reach out to him.
The surrendering mother, the abandoning father
The one criminalized, institutionalized via welfare structures, manipulated economically by the state (you made too much this month to qualify for benefits)
The other receiving no consequence for his abandonment, who also had the gaul to excoriate "welfare mothers" parasiting men's pay through wage garnishment, non-payment of child support, on and on
The cruelty of white-identifying men damaged by war, returned to a GI bill-fueled housing and education bonanza for them and only them, amplifying their importance as the male breadwinner of nuclear family.
My great uncle who didn't like chicken so no one could eat chicken in the household.
Bullies, Tyrants.
Normalized violence, terrorization of children who behaved.
Can only imagine how "bad" children (gender non-conforming, LGBT) would have been treated.
Karen Lemke (she, her, hers) is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.
Topic: Karen Lemke (she, her, hers)'s Personal Meeting Room
Join Zoom Meeting
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Meeting ID: 647 731 0135
Passcode: 3NBTFv
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